Shows like "Everybody Loves Raymond" and more recently, movies like "License to Wed" give us a snapshot of a societal shift toward women in relational control. Although women have made many necessary advances in society over the last 40 years, there seems to be a trend of women leading unbalanced relationships and doing most of the work. Women are taking up responsibility for full-time careers, but they’re still maintaining the role of full-time mom as well. It seems to be an underlying assumption in our society, and many of us have failed to notice this shift has occurred.

Although this role shift may not appear problematic, some women might recognize themselves in a few of the following questions.

• Are you exhausted from trying to take care of your responsibilities and your husband’s?
• Do you wish, deep down that he would take some of the weight off your shoulders by taking the initiative sometimes?
• Do you not trust your husband to get the job done?

If you were able to say yes to any of these questions, I would like to suggest that, if done properly, adherence to biblical principles about marriage responsibilities can produce a more satisfying relationship. You might be surprised by what Scripture says about marriage.

Eph. 5:25 says, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." The Bible describes a man’s role as loving his wife well by serving her. I don’t think many women would object to being loved well! And I don’t think many men would act dictatorially or irresponsibly if they were following the precept of loving her well.

Titus 2: 4-5 says that women should "love their husbands and children" and ""be subject to their husbands so that no one will malign the word of God." It seems obvious, but in order to be subject to our husbands, we must let them take over sometimes! That means stepping out of the way and encouraging them to take responsibility, even if they have failed us in the past. We need to show them that we trust their ability to make good decisions for the family and work together with them toward that end.

So why should you do relationships the way Scripture suggests, particularly if you’re not a professing Christian? I would like to suggest that when it’s done as Scripture says, it works. Marriage can be a true partnership that has equally important halves to make up the whole. If you’re unsure of where to start making changes in your current relationship, please make a marriage counseling appointment with one of our therapists to explore this issue and find out how you can best begin to pursue potentially successful relationship responsibilities in your own life.